The drive to work was always a trip of contemplations. Thinking about my parents burned bright on my mind. It’s never easy to survive tragedy and bounce back into the swing of everyday life. I never really paid attention to the low volume radio but the extra noise kept me company. I used to love waking up early to get my day started but lately I wasn’t much of a morning person. I lost my father in an accident, and my mother couldn’t handle the loss. She had a nervous breakdown and is in a mental hospital, so really I lost both parents in one awful moment. It’s a challenge for me to get up and go on with my life like nothing has happened. Just getting out of bed sometimes makes me feel like I am betraying my parents.
Ever since the car accident I have excruciating headaches. I went into the kitchen and pulled out the drawer that my medication was in. At the moment I was taking prescription pain killers, sleeping pills, and sometimes anti-depressants. I hadn’t needed to take those pills in a long time. I tried to deter the pain from gaining force. If it didn’t, I was going to have to cancel my date with Christine and go straight to bed. The headaches are almost blinding at times, and literally feel like a hammer is banging inside of my brain. Every time I think about the trip I am reminded of the worst day of my life.
I had just gotten back from a weekend ski trip in Aspen with some girlfriends, including Christine. It was mid-winter and my flight was delayed for several hours due to a terrible snow storm that hit the area. My dad, a surgeon at Milford General Hospital picked me up from the airport after a thirty-hour shift; the staff was low because of the storm so he decided to stick around to help out as much as he could. We were both pretty tired but it never occurred to me that dad was not in any kind of shape to drive. It was 4:45 on a Thursday morning, and it was dark and freezing cold. Sleet came down pretty hard, and made the roads very slick. It looked like dad was doing fine, and I always felt safe when he was behind the wheel. Mom was waiting for us with hot cocoa and I was so excited to see her and tell her about my trip.
The ride was long and I dozed off a few times. I woke abruptly to the sound of skidding tires and a sudden swerving motion. Dad’s head was slumped down over the steering wheel, his glasses were crooked and his eyes were closed.
“Dad! Dad! Wake up!” I yelled. I yanked off my seatbelt to shake him with force. The car was spinning out of control. His head bobbed up and down and his eyes lazily open and closed. I grabbed the steering wheel and tried to scoot over as close as I could towards him and reach for the break with my foot. The car was going too fast and bumped and swayed through the light traffic. The car sped up and then everything went black.
I’d never been a “normal” person. Ever since I was a child I’d had experiences that were hard to explain. For example, I frequently had “flashes” that showed me glimpses of the future. I also remember times when a small light would emerge from my fingers, and I was able to move things using the light. Sometimes I saw things in my visions as well, like shadows and creatures. I could also see an aura around people—usually either a bright blue color or a muddled gray. Sometimes I’d seen a red aura, which for some reason really scared me. I’d tried to ignore these abilities, and there were times when I refused to admit that strange things were happening…
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